Raise a Glass

Your best friend is getting married; your beloved aunt is turning 80; your boss is retiring. But when you realize that the coming occasion will be a time for you to give a toast or speech, your enthusiasm disappears.

You’re not alone: Fear of public speaking is incredibly common. However, you don’t need to let the jitters stop you. The right words, prepared in advance, will boost your confidence and allow you to honor, fully, the occasions in your life.

I’m a published journalist and creative writer (the NY Times, the Village Voice, Real Simple, etc.) and have worked as a writing teacher along the way. Creating and sustaining community is a major focus of my writing—and of my life at large. Toasts are a part of that: I view significant life events as an opportunity for all involved to reflect on their connections and strengthen their bonds. It has been my honor to write, and give, toasts and speeches for birthdays, weddings, funerals, baby showers, anniversaries, conferences, and more. When I started getting requests from friends to help them with their own talks, I was happy to jump in. Now I’m broadening the endeavor by starting Raise a Glass.

Am I an extrovert? No. Do I have some magic ability to conquer jitters? Not at all (my hands still shake sometimes when I am speaking). But what I have is the confidence that comes from knowing that what I’ve written for the occasion is what it needs to be. When we work together, you’ll end up with the same confidence about what you’ve prepared.

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So how does this work?

First we will speak in person, by phone or Zoom. We’ll discuss the upcoming event—who, what, where, when—and the particulars of what you want to get across. I will ask some questions and take notes.

Next, you decide the process. You can write a draft of your toast or speech, based on what we have discussed, and I’ll look it over; or you can ask me to write a draft, and you’ll look it over. Or maybe you’ve already written a draft and want help fine-tuning it—that’s great too. Once we have a first draft, it’s a short road to a final version that’s ready to go.

The price includes our intro conversation (approx. 30 minutes); the creation of a draft (by you or by me); a review of the draft; and agreement on a final draft. When you purchase a session, I will email you to arrange a schedule.

Frequently Asked Questions:

Q: Who decides on the final version of my toast or speech?
A: You do—100%. My job is to help come up with something that feels ideal toyou. We will work together to produce something you love.

Q: “Raise a Glass”—that sounds like it’s about alcohol. I don’t drink!
A: I hear you. I chose this name because it calls up images of a community coming together to mark an important event. But from scotch neat to sparkling water, what’s in the glass you raise is entirely up to you.

Q: This is just for “happy occasions,” right? Weddings, birthdays, etc.?
A: Nope. I can help you with any occasion you’ve got, including funerals and memorials. I can also help with professional events at which you’d like to—or you need to—say a few words.

I can even help with “outside the box” occasions that don’t often get recognized. Divorce party? Friendship-iversary? I’ve got you. And as a cancer survivor of 17 years, I am all over any “medical-milestone events” you might have.

Other questions? Email me at [email protected].

Here’s to it all: Raise a glass. —Pamela Rafalow Grossman

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